Required Reading

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

A thread of randoms including a cowbell.



Good evening. I have some stories in my head that I want to write down but they can't get out until I move the random thoughts out of the way. And so, I will.

Here goes. . . . .



What's the deal with Stacey Dash? You know. . .the woman who was in that movie Clueless (which was, hands down, one of Deanna's favorites) and who is now saying lots of clueless things on FoxNews? Yeah, her. She's a hard core republican and now stands in regularly on Sean Hannity's show. Okay, and let me just come right out and say this before someone else misunderstands: For the record, I do not believe that being black automatically mandates that you be a democrat. But I do think that the same way there is "girl code" and "dude code" that there just has to be a bit of a "underrepresented minority code" that should be upheld whenever possible. Oh, and that code includes not referring collectively to your people in Louisiana as having a "plantation mentality"--that is  under the Obama administration---on live television. Even if, God forbid, you felt that way.

Super disappointing.

Not that she is a republican. But that she felt like that was an okay thing to say. Plantation mentality? How hurtful is it to evoke a slavery reference? Fail, man. Double thumbs down.

What else?

The pink is for Breast Cancer awareness.


I am a full on football mom for sure. I was talking to a friend at work who said she couldn't even picture me as a football mama. At which point I promptly pulled my cowbell out of my purse and showed it to her. Because, I'm saying, you can always use more cowbell.




Boom.



Zachary had a sleepover on Saturday. He turns eight on Thursday and promptly reminded me that, although we don't have parties on birthdays that can't be divided by five, his brother DID have a few buddies sleep over when he turned eight. So he didn't so much as ask me but sort of notified me that he'd be doing the same. Except for a few things that would be different:



  1. He has three best friends, not two like Isaiah did at eight. This means it is unavoidable to have more than two friends sleep over. 
  2. One of his best friends has a brother who is in fourth grade like Isaiah. And Isaiah will be there. And they get along well (remember, Mom?) And that, remember Mom when you and dad said it is so awesome when something includes the other brother? And how not awesome it is when things that totally could involve both boys doesn't which is why you usually welcome the siblings? Well, that makes it four boys coming over, okay?
  3. I don't want a cake or to go anywhere. I just want you to let us play outside as long as we want. Even if it is a little bit chilly.

Easy enough. And so they did. They played outside even when it was chilly and played inside, too. And the boys were happy and you know what? I was, too.




Hmmmm. . . .

You know what I realized the other day while standing in the express line at Publix? I realized that I think few things are cuter than a little baby with a pacifier in his or her mouth. I just love the sight of a little 8 or 9 month old sucking away on a binky. So stinking cute.

However.

Let me tell you this: I feel the EXACT opposite about spotting big kids with pacifiers. Not even cute. Like, at all. So, check it. When I was at Publix that day, this lady had a baby on her hip that looked all Lisa Simpson cute with her paci in her mouth. Wait. Was that Lisa? Oh hell. I forgot the baby's name on the Simpsons but you know who I'm talking about. Anyways. The baby is all cute and gurgle and I'm just smiling at her mom and raising my eyebrows. Because that baby was super cute.

Then I hear a little voice and look down. What did I see? Another kid who appeared to be about 4 or so going to town on his own pacifier. Ma

Matter of fact, he took it out of his mouth and pointed the nipple at the candy bars asking for a Snicker please.

And yes. The boy said, "A Snicker bar please."

Maaaaan, I wanted to smack that thing out of his hand like Shaq on a jumper. He had a big giant overbite, too. And I am very proud of myself for remaining in my lane. I am.

Yeah, man.

Hey. Do any of you get your underarms waxed? Best. Thing. Ever. I'm for real. If you've never tried it, you should. You'll be wondering where it's been all your life.

I went running at Stone Mountain park last weekend and was doing a long run. I hit a bathroom at mile five and there was a few people waiting  in line. Just as I got to the front, this woman walks in and says, "Scuse me, but how bad you got to go?"

I looked from left to right like, Is she talking to me? Well. She was.

"Ummmm. . ."  That was my response because I was so caught off guard.

"Do you have to do number one or number two?" she went on. And just before it could get any weirder, one of the stall doors flew open. "Gotta go," I said. No pun intended.

Yes. That woman asked me if I had to do number 1 or number 2. Craziness.

Ummm. . .let me see. . .anything else? Oh. Yes. This.






I did a turn and burn to Scottsdale, Arizona to give a talk at Mayo's "Managing Complex Patients" Conference. It was logistically a nightmare to get to but after the talk it felt sort of like a mini vacay.



Yeah, so that was cool.

Hey! How cool is it that this woman, Leah R., is now my intern? Remember her from her very first day on the Internal Medicine wards as a student? Time flies, man. She's a big girl now.




Le sigh.

Oh, and this--my all girl ward team.



Boom.

Yawn. That's all I've got. What's up with y'all?

***
Happy Hump Day!

Now on my mental iPod. . . because sometimes you just get a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell. Funniest. SNL skit. Ever.

More Cowbell - Saturday Night Live from Dee Three on Vimeo.

Boom.

2 comments:

  1. This was a fun post to read -- I loved, especially, your very tactful remarks about the Fox news broadcasters. I get what you said -- I've always felt very curious about the Log Cabin Republicans, wondering what motivates them. And then there's all the gay people who insist on the Catholic Church. Well, it's a big world.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I love the pink nail polish an. I think this is the first time I've ever seen a burger look elegant. I hope it tasted as good as it looked.

    ReplyDelete

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