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| Together? Leaving Grady. . .on a Saturday night? Uhhh. . .yeah. |
It's been seven hours and fifteen days. . . .since I've exercised or really done much of anything for myself. I looked in the mirror yesterday and heard the words to this old R&B song called "Seems You're Much Too Busy." The song says:
Seems you're much to busy
and I can't stand it
Seems you're much too busy these days
and I can't handle it
That's how I'm feeling this week. Like I just have too much going on. I'm amazed that I've even managed to write in the last few weeks considering that, technically, I do that for me. I guess that begs the question -- do I still see this as something for me? Does the fact that this has been quasi-maintained mean that I do, in fact, have my ducks in a row? Or does it mean that it has somehow scooted over into the realm of things I do for others?
Yikes. Those questions are too heavy for it to be this early in the morning.
Someone said it seems like I have it "all together all the time." All together? All the time? Ha. Nope. I so very do not. When I'm on wards, my boat begins to capsize. The balls I'm juggling start to fall. And usually those balls are the ones related to ME.
"How do you do all those things?" a friend asked me on Sunday as our kids splashed in a pool.
"Most days, I simply prioritize. But this week I'm not doing that so well." And to make my point, I lifted my leg and showed her the unfortunate stubble growing on my unshaved legs. Which, now that I think of it, was beyond what qualifies for stubble.
I even missed a hair appointment. And y'all know how I feel about the beauty shop.
Man. It seems I'm much too busy these days. . . for me. Do you ever feel this way? I do. Especially on wards. It's so love-hate. I love, love, love it. But the time commitment, the worrying, the teaching, the everything gets to be a lot.
Seems I'm much too busy these days. And I can't stand it.
But let me tell you--this will be rectified. I have some time off next week after the long weekend. Sure do. And in that time I will exercise. Drink some hooch. Listen to some good music. Shake my hips. Write some prose. Read something non-medical. Give a TED talk in my bathroom mirror about a whole bunch of nothing. Whatever it is, know this--I'm going to do something, anything for me.
Me.
***
Happy Tuesday.
Here's that song playing on my mental iPod. Enjoy.
I want a "like" button on your posts so much! :)
ReplyDeleteAwww thanks, Dorothy! I consider that a "like" for sure!
DeleteYou are SO BEAUTIFUL
ReplyDeleteLook who's talking, lady! Your entire family looks like it could be in a catalog--especially Macy with that gorgeous hair!
DeleteI'm feeling like this right now...
ReplyDeleteHere's to both of us getting a little 'me' time soon.
- Bridgette
Fo sho.
DeleteI think your blog is reflective writing at its best. In that sense, you do it for you. The good part is that you share it with us so that we're also encouraged and enriched. That others benefit from what you share is rewarding for you as well. Maybe this is why you manage to keep blogging under ridiculous time constraints. I hope you enjoy your "you" time... and shave them fuzzy legs!
ReplyDeletenancy
Shaved 'em this morning. Whew! Planning on some mani/pedi action next week!
DeleteAmen sister. Amen.
ReplyDeleteMaria, fellow Meharrian
The doors of the church are now open! Ha ha ha.
DeleteThe weekend couldn't get here soon enough! I'm day-dreaming about some 'me time' as well :)
ReplyDelete-- Tara
Overwhelmed does not even come close to describing how I feel. Checking 2-3 blogs each day and occasionally stealing a minute to comment on them is what qualifies as "me time" and still makes me feel guilty. Don't get me wrong, it's not like I am clearing greenhouse gases, bringing clean water to everyone in the world, or curing cancer during the rest of my day... I'm not even doing a half-decent job of studying for the massive exam I am going to take in a few days... I don't write a blog, I don't have anything that even remotely resembles a social life right now, I contribute nothing to the world around me, I don't even earn a paychek... aaaaand... I waste a lot of time... a TON of time... I am just so exhausted beyond capacity (I think, or at least that's my excuse).
ReplyDeleteYou are doing an amazing job. You are successful in all important areas of your life (and that is huge!!), you make a difference in the world around you each day, you touch the lives of people whose very existence may be in peril, you have a job that you love, that suits you well, that actually pays money (huge bonus... hehe), you have 2 happy and well-adjusted kids, you have a husband with whom and in whom you still find pleasure, you manage to be well-dressed and made-up enough to go out in public (even with stubble!), you manage to squeeze in pool time for your kids, and time to meet friends... AND you write a wonderful blog!!! Never doubt the fact that no matter how busy, less-than-perfect and "dropping balls"-y you feel, you are still absolutely and completely amazing!
{This is the end of my "me time"... haha}
I feel you.
ReplyDeleteTried to squeeze in a little "me time" pedicure today, then wrecked it as I got into the car. Quality problems! It just means that soon - yep - I get to enjoy another pedicure.
Hi -
ReplyDeleteI just found your blog and I am quickly becoming your newest fan... You write so beautifully, and capture a lot about how I feel about being a hospitalist at a teaching hospital... (wards... I love them too, but they make me so darn tired after!)
So, I just wanted to take a moment to thank you for being inspirational! (and I hope 20 months later, you're still finding some time for you...)
Thanks - Laura
Thank YOU, Laura. And welcome.
Delete