A day in the life: March Madness.

Yesterday I:

• Woke up early in a quiet house because my children had spent the night with their grandmother. (Thanks, Shugsie.)
• Also woke up after sleeping "spread eagle" across the bed because my lover the BHE was out of town on a weekend trip with his college friends.
• Surprised myself by just how early I woke up after sleeping "spread eagle" considering how late I'd stayed up watching "Juno" for what I am certain is up to the double-digits in number of times watched.
• Listened to this version of this song:

• Realized that I love this song no matter who sings it.
• Sat at my kitchen table watching all of the runners go by through the window. Damn. We have a lot of runners going by in this neighborhood.
• Thought about joining those neighborhood runners but decided instead to savor my moments before going in for rounds. 
• Drank coffee out of a Snoopy and Woodstock Christmas mug.
• Didn't feel bad about being at "bedside baptist" that morning since I knew I had to work.
• Caught up on some of my favorite blogs while smiling at Snoopy and Woodstock.
• Realized that I should probably be catching up on the overnight events of my patients, so swapped over to the electronic medical record.
• Decided to have myself a real breakfast (which, for me, meant two eggs over hard drenched in the left over salsa I had from La Fonda Latina.)

salsa from La Fonda

• Wondered if the mixture of coffee and cilantro this early in the morning was such a good idea.
• Decide that both coffee and cilantro are always a good idea no matter what.
• Dug through the kids' drawers for soccer things after remembering that spring soccer practice was starting that afternoon. (Thanks, Harry.)
• Wondered just how bad it would be to practice with one size 12 soccer cleat and one size 11 soccer cleat. (Especially if you wear a size 12 1/2 soccer cleat.)
• Threw on clothes and dashed to Grady after the soccer search became futile.
• Laughed when I saw my two interns, Doug and Matt, who had dressed identically on accident.
• No, seriously. Identically.
• Decided that a blue oxford, khaki pants, and brown loafers could absolutely put you at risk for having a twin on any given Sunday, Monday, or Tuesday in the Southern United States.
• That or seersucker. Southerners dig the seersucker thing depending upon the month.
• And the hoity-toity ones like Lily Pulitzer which I admittedly don't fully understand.
• Developed an attack plan for rounds with my twin-terns because you always need an attack plan.
• For me, that attack plan always involves trying to set an E.T.F.R. (estimated time finishing rounding.) Because if you just round all day and never get work done, that kind of sucks for everyone. Patients included.
• Had some very effective management rounds with the twin-terns and made some solid decisions.
• Stopped by our patient's room and played "rock-paper-scissors" again after examining him. 
• Called the Spanish interpreter who met us on the floor quicker than you can say "Rumpelstiltskin."
• Was really glad to see that it was Alvaro, the same interpreter who'd helped me the day before.
• Reminded my twin-tern that they are "interpreters" and not "translators" because translation is from written to written and interpretation is from spoken to spoken. (And because it annoys them to be called "translators.")
• Realized that calling the interpreters means acquiring a bunch of new friends in the hospital since I had been underutilizing their expertise.
• Sat at the nurses' station and laughed with some of my favorite nurses after meeting our E.T.F.R. 
• Created an attack plan for what needed to be done before achieving my own E.T.L.G. (estimated time leaving Grady.)
• Factored laughing with my favorite nurses into that E.T.L.G.
• Re-grouped with my twin-terns before preparing to leave. Laughed again at the fact that they were dressed alike and at myself for being witty enough to refer to them as "twin-terns."
• Headed home to restart the soccer search.
• Made it to Mom's house to snatch up Thing 1 and Thing 2.
• Was in a hurry so rapid-fire changed boys into soccer gear (which kind of looked like those models backstage at fashion shows since it involved me, my sister and my mom.)
• Was proud of myself for making good time.
• Wanted to bang my head on the steering wheel when Zachary announced his favorite thing to announce as soon as I get on the highway and when I am in a hurry and on the tippy-tip edge of making good time: "I have to poop like really, really, really, really bad and I CAN'T hold it."
• Wondered if there could possibly be a more regular child that Zachary. 
• Tried to gage how many "reallys" constitutes actually stopping before getting to the soccer field.
• Answer: five.
• May have uttered an expletive or two while pulling over to deal with Mr. Regular. 
• Ignored the lady in Subway when she said, "Hey! No public restroom, ma'am!"
• Felt annoyed as Zachary commenced to strike up a conversation with me while being hoisted over the non-public bathroom commode. Seriously, kid?
• Got to Zachary's soccer practice a few moments late but avoided what could have been a very ugly situation.
• Felt annoyed that there was an hour between Isaiah's and Zachary's practices but relieved that they were at the same field this time.
• Realized how cold it was outside after watching the kids gyrating and with teeth chattering.
• Discovered that Isaiah's very best friend is ON HIS SOCCER TEAM. (This is an extremely big deal, people.)
• Made it home and was extremely happy to see the BHE.
• Threw those dirty boys straight into Harry's truck and went to Chili's for dinner (upon the kids'  request.)
• Ate a surprisingly good steak at Chili's. (That or I was just hungry.)
• Sent funny text messages to my friend Lesley M. which included "How YOU doin'?" (Wendy Williams version, not Joey Tribbiani version.)
• Read the electronic medical record again after tucking the kids in.
• Fell asleep four times on the Atlanta Trainwreck Housewives before finally giving up and going to bed.
• Fell asleep four more times while attempting to pray and finally said (with a big ol' yawn) what the Grady elders say: "Tha's alright. . . the Lord know my heart." 
• Decided to just lay there and feel thankful for another day.
• Drifted to sleep feeling just that.
• Woke up this morning feeling the same. . . . 
• Listened to "I like the sunrise" again.
• Because I do.

***

Happy Monday.