Twenty-twos.

Us on rounds yesterday: Size matters.

Tuesday on Work Rounds:

Me: "Did you hear that heart murmur?"

Intern: "No. . . I didn't hear it."

Me: "That's because your stethoscope is too long."

Intern: "What? It's the same size as yours."

Me: "Ehhh, no, sir. 'Tis not."

Intern: "Is."

Me: "Isn't."

Student: "I didn't hear it either."

Me: "You need a twenty-two incher."

Intern: (holding up stethoscope) "I thought mine was the short one."

Me: "Naaah. Not as short as mine." (holding up my even shorter scope)

Intern: "Darn. I cut mine to make it shorter."

Student: "Really?"

Me: "I've cut a few in my day. But don't go cutting up stethoscopes. Just get a twenty-two."

Student: (eyes widening) "Whoa. Is it really better, Dr. M?"

Me: "Well, it depends. You are more likely to get coughed on, barfed on, accosted, licked on the cheek or infected with TB since you're only twenty-two inches away. But you won't miss any heart murmurs."

Student: "Shweet!"

***

I love the medical students.

This ain't the only time you need to be rollin' on twenty-two's.